Monday, August 5, 2013

Dear Mom, I miss Arkansas.

week of July 22 - 28

When we left Snowflake and drove back to our new home in Colorado, I felt oddly homesick. It was strange because our first few weeks in Fort Collins I was exhilarated to be in a new place, with low humidity and all kinds of fun new things to do. It kind of felt like we were on an extended vacation (except for the inconveniences of moving, of course).  But when we came back, I think my subconscious finally realized that we aren't going back to Bryant, Arkansas. I was sad for days! Hummer, too, said that he felt sad and homesick.

So I kept unpacking and kept checking our old ward's facebook page and thinking about everyone there. Our time in Arkansas was so hard in some ways, but I am starting to see now what a special time that was for our family. We really put down emotional roots and got attached to many of the families at church, our wonderful neighbors the Pooles, and even our property itself and the schools in the area.

I miss our beautiful backyard there and having the vacant lot behind where we could pick blackberries. I miss being able to send out the boys to jump on the trampoline with Rosebud or to the drainage ditch to catch fish. I really miss having a garden. I miss knowing most of the teachers at the elementary school and having them know us.

I miss being able to visit the cemetery where Benjamin is buried. We brought the wind chimes that hung at his grave for several years and hung them in our front-yard flower bed. I was hoping that that would give me a place to feel close to him like I do at his grave. But I always feel self-conscious out there because our neighbors are so close on either side and across the street and there's always someone walking by or driving by.

And so, the euphoria of moving west has worn off a little bit and I am wishing for some familiarity again.

I spent most of a day this week making Rosebud's room beautiful again. She was very appreciative and seemed almost happy to take her nap that day. I hope that lasts! :) Also I went to book group where we talked about My Name is Asher Lev and had a very satisfying discussion.

DC and I went out on a limb and have joined a German meetup group in Longmont. We went to dinner with them on Friday and met some very nice people. I was gratified to see that I did not have the worst German at our table. (Only the second worst. :) It was super fun to go and practice Deutsch and during the drive to Longmont to have a chance to talk and talk and talk to my captive audience DC. He is very busy trying to finish up the prerequisites specific to the program at CSU. (Just finished Biomechanics--yay! You should see his killer model of a finger. It is amazing.)

On Saturday our stake had a pioneer day celebration. Fluffy and Hummer and Rosebud all participated in the pie-eating contest and Exacto joined them for the wheelbarrow races. It was great fun. I'm glad they had the chance to see what a pioneer celebration is like since we didn't do those very often in Florida or Arkansas. :)

And so, that was our first week back. Still boxes to unpack, but Exacto worked for an hourly wage and unpacked a bunch for me. Also he organized the basement because he is totally awesome like that. Thank you for hiring him when he was at your house!

Love,
Michelle

2 comments:

Cathy said...[Reply to comment]

We think you're just gone for the summer, too. So glad you blog :).

llamitanan said...[Reply to comment]

It is normal for you to miss where you spent so many years of your life. I'm glad you made many eternal friends there. I am going to miss visiting Arkansas too. BTW, what did DC use to make his finger model? I pray DC will enjoy the preparation for his new career and that the children will adjust quickly to their new schools. Sure love you! Mom